The Koala Box: Why People Play A Lot at Our Events

I remember the Time Before the Koala Box. BEHIVE, then known as NEHG, had our first post-munch practice at a Panera Bread back in 2013, thanks to Lee Allure - the motivation being, we've talked about hypnosis for two hours, now we want to see some shit!!

Since then a post-munch practice has been a tradition, but it was usually pretty flat. There were a few awkward propositions, there would be a couple of trances - usually between existing partners - but for the most part we kept talking about Doctor Who or whatever 90% of the time.

Then about 6 months ago we introduced the koala box - which is a short Pringles can, sour cream and onion variety - and

It.

Went.

Bananas.

Every time since then the post-munch has had around a dozen trances or more. In many rounds there is a sea of hands of people volunteering - people I never saw volunteer before the change.

What's the secret? I think the koala box gives people a chance to

1) Easily volunteer to do the hypnosis they want
2) Invisibly avoid playing with people or suggestions they don't want

Here are the rules of the koala box.

• Pieces of paper and pens are passed to different parts of the table. While the dinner check is being settled, the koala box is passed around, and people fill it with ideas for Hypnotic things they would like to see demonstrated. More suggestions can be stuffed in the box continuously over the evening.

• One person, the Koala Wrangler, explains the rules and has someone (traditionally a first-time attendee), draw the first suggestion and read it out loud.

• The Wrangler then calls for a volunteer to either bottom or top that suggestion, alternating with each round. If the suggestion requires multiple tops or multiple bottoms, the wrangler says so.

• The Wrangler counts to five ("One koala, two koala..."). If no one has raised their hand, the box is passed one person to the left and the next suggestion is quickly read out.

• If more than one person has raised their hand, the Wrangler selects among them (emphasizing people who haven't had a turn yet). Otherwise they select the person who raised their hand.

• The Wrangler then counts to five again, and people can volunteer to either top or bottom (depending on the round) with that person for that suggestion. Again, if no one raises their hand, the box is passed and we swiftly move on to the next round.

• The first person selected chooses among the second set of volunteers.

• The Wrangler emphasizes that the selected people will now negotiate exactly what it means to do that suggestion, and that discovering that one or both doesn't want to do it is a perfectly normal and acceptable outcome for the negotiation.

• We all watch the resulting scene, and usually applaud!

• Then the box gets passed to the left, and we continue drawing pieces of paper from the box, with the Wrangler now calling for top volunteers first if the last round had bottom first, or vice versa.

After the immediate huge success of the koala box - seriously, trances were going on all over the place - I was thinking we should develop more games like this for the post-munch. Then I realized that it's all we need, because anything can go in that box. Here's a list of what got pulled out at our two most recent munches:

• Five stroke induction
• 6 inductions in 60 seconds
• Vibrating chair that gradually increases in intensity
• In your vision white and black are inverted
• Co-topping
• Posable mannequin
• Hyperempiria
• First time top
• Make something cuter
• Use magnetic beads in an induction without it being a pendulum
• Resisted control
• Deja vu
• In trance, recite the alphabet, each letter takes you deeper
• Defragmentation
• Leave a trigger for the rest of the night
• Induction with no talking
• 5 sense overloaded
• First time hypnotee

Last time there were at least 6 distinct tops, out of 18 people, all figuring out what kind of spin to put on these suggestions. And one first time top, which is absolutely typical.

Because it lowers the bar for people to jump in. After all, it's for educational purposes! Someone wants to see it demonstrated! My favourite is how in the very last second of the count, people will muster up the courage to shoot up their hands. We want to facilitate courage.

Other groups work well structuring their "let's see the thing!" time like classes, but the koala box fits the vibe of BEHIVE, in its non-hierarchy: we are Initiates, Virtuosos and Enthusiasts because we are all growing and developing, we are all figuring out our taste, sexually and hypnotically, and we are all creating.

These rules do a lot to help anyone, top or bottom, freely volunteer without pressure to trance in a way or with a person they don't want to - particularly important to someone like me, who sexualizes hypnosis a lot. But possible bugs still exist. For example if someone volunteers, and then the only volunteer for the other side is someone they don't want to scene with. We are thinking of ways to make it absolutely normal to back out at that stage, but it's a tricky one.

So the Koala box will probably evolve more, and we're always looking for ideas and feedback, but it has already evolved a lot. That's why you shouldn't change or drop rules before trying it out! Even though it might be tempting to simplify. We gradually added these aspects to solve specific problems:

• The 5 count. If you don't count to five, the person who is fastest at putting their hand up (and has english as their native language, doesn't have auditory processing issues etc) will always get picked. It also helps to avoid a long awkward pause deciding whether to move onto the next one.

• The koala wrangler. For a long time we just had everyone who raised their hand find each other and negotiate scenes. This was enjoyably chaotic, but led to some people feeling "invisible" when they raised their hand but didn't manage to connect - of course they may just have been experiencing soft no's, but with the Wrangler, everyone is acknowledged without necessarily getting to play. It also led to a lot of multiples of suggestions, which was fun but made us cover less suggestions. And there was always someone hustling along the box and giving the instructions, so having a wrangler formalizes that work.

• Alternating tops first and bottoms first. It's easier to be in the second group, because you know exactly who you're potentially playing with, so this way we don't favour tops or bottoms.

• The first person chooses the second. If the koala wrangler chose the second person, there would be pressure for them to play.

• The name. It contains a kind of magic that I frankly wouldn't tinker with.

If you try out koala boxing, let me know! (and I would be interested to see if it translates to any other kink communities, such as rope) There other games I like for groups of hypno people who are quite experienced and have a lot of trust with each other, but for a mixed experience group, in a munch-like setting, I'm going for this one every time.

Feb 2020 updates

A few amendments BEHIVE has made to the koala box since I first published this, based on the last year of experience with it:

• The koala wrangler now keeps hold of the box, rather than people passing it along, and prompts specific people to draw and read, usually focusing on first-timers. (the "box" is also now a sizeable Bob's Sweet Stripes Soft Peppermint Candy Tub, rather than a pringles can!)
• We now require volunteers to pass a note to each other before beginning the negotiation, to give people a chance to pass on things they want their partner to know but not the whole room. This only seems to be needed in about 1 time in 10, but then it is very needed and appreciated.
• Now one of the exec members acts as the "koala observer", whose job is to listen carefully to the negotiation, gently prompt if there's something missing, and watch the scene carefully to make sure the scene matches the negotiation. We don't particularly point this person out. This was added because of the fact that though the negotiation and scene are observed by the whole room, it's surprisingly easy to not remember whether something was actually part of the negotiation, which then makes it hard to intervene confidently in the moment. Very small consent violations are common, especially when people are new, and we want to normalize both calling those out and responding well to having your action called out. Observing is a tiring and intense job, so we rotate it each event.

We have also written out some koala wrangler's instructions, since there's a lot to remember, feel free to use these as a starting point:

• Starting in this part of the evening there's going to be hypnosis demonstrations, so please feel free to leave if you don't want to see that.
• Notice the koala box going around. (point to it) You can stuff it with ideas for Hypnotic things you would like to see demonstrated. Anything you can think of, as long as it's acceptable in a restaurant environment, and doesn't have effects that last beyond the munch.
• When you're watching trances, keep in mind that "splash damage" can be a factor, and you might start feeling trancy. Feel free to step out at any point.
• I'm going to ask people to draw slips of paper from the box at random and read them out.
• On the first draw, I'm going to ask for volunteers to be the hypnotist for this suggestion. Raise your hand AND KEEP IT UP.
• I will pick one, and then I'll ask for volunteers to be hypnotized for this suggestion. Raise your hand AND KEEP IT UP. If there's at least two, the hypnotist will choose among them. The hypnotist can choose more than one!
• Either participant can withdraw at any time.
• If there's no match, we just move onto the next draw.
• When there's a match, the two will sit together, and begin by passing a piece of paper to the other person, which may contain important information for their partner that they don't want to share with the group, or it can be blank or a nice message like, "excited to trance with you!" Each person reads it and then passes it back.
• Then they will negotiate the trance, including how they interpret the suggestion. We expect to see a thorough negotiation for everything that happens in the scene, in particular any touching and any hypnotic suggestions (including suggestions to feel especially good after the trance). If they decide not to do the scene, we call that a successful negotiation, and move onto the next draw. Please also negotiate aftercare. We ask the top not to initiate anything not negotiated, including a hug, after the start of the first trance.
• We also ask that if you have had any substances today, like alcohol or pot, that may affect your responses or ability to consent, you simply disclose it to your partner so they can make an informed decision if they're comfortable with it.
• For the second draw, the hypnotee will be chosen first, and will choose the hypnotist, and then we'll alternate back and forth like that.
• Now will a first time attendee please make the first draw?

As a last note, we make no claim of ownership over koala boxing (or whatever you want to call it), and fully expect it to evolve and mutate as needed whereever it is used. We'd be pleased to hear if you try something like this, including variations you tried and what did or didn't work for you, but consider these ideas public domain and do whatever you like with them.